News
Help! My Kid Won’t Eat Their Packed Lunch.
Sep
My little brother was an extremely picky eater. Throughout elementary school, he left sandwiches untouched, soup still hot in its thermos — and salad (pasta, potato or plain green) never stood a chance. Eventually, my mother walked a hot lunch over to him: pork chops, baked potatoes, plain pasta and chicken thighs.
According to the experts we spoke with, it’s not just my siblings bringing home their uneaten bento box every day. Skipping lunch is fairly typical. Crystal Karges, a registered dietitian nutritionist in San Diego, shared, “[Refusing lunch] is more common than you might think, especially for neurodivergent children, who may struggle with the standard lunchtime schedule in school settings, leading them to eat less at school. However, just because it’s common doesn’t mean it’s the norm for your child.”
Here’s what the experts recommend.
Picky Eater Or Distracted Diner?
Whether it’s an Instagram-worthy heart-shaped pizza made with English muffins with crinkle-cut fruit and veggies or a plain ham-and-cheese sandwich, when your kid brings it back uneaten, it’s hard not to blame the lack of enthusiasm on the meal. But not so fast, said Sarah Remmer, a registered dietitian and founder of The Centre for Family Nutrition in Calgary, Canada, who explained that your cooking might not be the problem.
“It could be that [your kids] just simply aren’t hungry — perhaps they had a filling breakfast or ate quite a bit the previous day,” she said. “Or they don’t have enough time to focus on their lunch and are too busy socializing or playing. It might be something totally obscure like not being able to open a container or baggie!”
Another culprit for a less-than-enthusiastic response could be back-to-school stress and change of routines. Moving from lazy summer days with easy access to the pantry for snacks to more rigid routines around when and what to eat can be unsettling, according to Cuyler Romeo, an occupational therapist and pediatric feeding specialist in Phoenix.
“It may be difficult for them to eat on demand according to a set schedule that they’re not used to following, and then you layer into that being given select foods in a particular way with limited access,” Romeo said.
Nutritional Concerns
If your first instinct is to panic that your growing kiddo isn’t getting their nutritional needs met, Karges reassures that most children naturally make up for any gaps by eating more before or after school. Try packing lunches that include kid faves along with new foods that they are still learning to enjoy.
4 Ways To Encourage Kids To Eat Their Lunches
First, get to the root of the problem by chatting with your child about why they aren’t eating their food. Try asking with curiosity rather than frustration. Is it that they find their containers challenging to open? Or perhaps their lunch box is embarrassing them. “Gently approach the subject by ‘noticing’ that your child is coming home with an uneaten lunch,” Remmer said. “This will open up a safe discussion vs. if a parent said something like, ‘Why does your school lunch always come home uneaten?! This is such a waste!’ which may feel threatening or as if they’re in trouble (which means they may shut down). Then allow them to tell you what’s going on.”
Involve kids in the process.
The days when I’m most likely to “forget” my lunch (typically a sad desk salad) and go out with colleagues are when I’m not looking forward to the wilting greens in the office fridge. Kids are the same. Romeo recommends getting them involved in the lunch packing process from start to finish. “The more that they can interact with the food and put it in their lunchbox and prepare it, the more they’re mentally aware that this is what I’m going to eat for lunch that day,” she said.
If your budget allows, provide a few options for your child. An apple or a banana for a snack, or both, since, as Romeo shared, “Eating is on a continuum. We just need to give grace to those around us. Everyone’s different, and it’s OK that eating doesn’t look the same.”
Partner with your school’s administration and teachers to suss out the lunchroom situation. If kids are more interested in playing than eating, pack nutrient-dense snacks that can sustain them rather than one big meal, Remmer recommended.
When To Get Professional Help
“More than likely, if a child has or is developing an eating disorder, they’re showing other signs of this as well (not just the uneaten school lunch),” Remmer said. “They may be skipping out on breakfast and dinner as well or they may have a lot of anxiety around mealtimes or food, or perhaps they’ve become more fixated on their health, weight or size.”
If you’re concerned your child is developing an eating disorder, speak to your family physician, or you can find more information at the National Eating Disorder Association.
Romeo recommends ruling out pediatric feeding disorder or avoidant/restrictive food intake disorder (ARFID) if the school year is well underway and kids are still having difficulty with their lunches. Pediatric feeding disorder causes impaired intake of food and beverages due to physical or psychosocial dysfunction. ARFID is an eating disorder that involves an intense aversion to textures, smells and appearances rather than control over body image.
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A colorful bento box for toddlers with kid friendly utensils included
Pack a variety of foods and snacks for your little one in this colorful Munchkin lunch box with five sections. It comes with a set of utensils that snap into the top of the box so they don’t get lost. The little handle on top makes it easy for little ones to carry this leakproof dishwasher-safe container. Reviews say it’s the right size for for day care and pre-school aged kids.
Promising review: “This lunchbox is perfect for my 3-year-old son to take to preschool. The different compartments are good sizes for a variety of foods. And it’s super easy for my son to open and close, which means no big mess inside his bag!” — Shannon Fitzpatrick
L.L. Bean
A well-equipped lunchbox from a heritage outdoors brand
Leave it to the gear gurus at L.L.Bean to offer up a practical option that’s earned 4.5 stars (out of 5) from reviewers. Thanks to a zippered compartment, the bag can expand and offer an extra two inches of storage space. The insulated interior is equipped with an interior pocket for ice packs.
Promising review: “I love this lunchbox. I needed something to send to daycare that fits a Bento box, two (small) sippy cups, a couple snacks, and a slim ice pack. This does the job perfectly in its expanded form, and is great quality. I also love that I’ll be able to make it slimmer when our little guy gets older and needs less bulky stuff packed. Only wish I’d opted to get it monogrammed!” — Katie
Amazon
A leakproof dishwasher-safe 5-compartment box that’s perfect for picky eaters
Bentgo boxes have earned their spot on the top of the kid’s lunchbox pyramid, and for good reason. They’re durable, easy to clean, dishwasher-safe, come in 25 kid-approved colors and offer specific places for different types of foods and snacks. If your little one is picky about their food items touching, they’ll love the different sections. And many reviews speak to the company’s great customer service and willingness to replace broken boxes.
Promising review: “Super awesome lunch box for kids! It is leakproof as it says and is super easy to separate food for a picky eater!” — Lori
Amazon
An insulated lunch box for kiddos that like hot and cold food
If you spend any time on family TikTok, you’ve probably seen the insulated OmieBox. It’s a favorite among parents (and little ones) who like to pack hot food, like noodles or chicken nuggets, but also want to send some cold snacks, like produce or hummus. The insulated thermos section keeps hot food hot without heating the entire lunch bag, and it’s removable for days when you want to pack a sandwich.
Promising review: “This is an amazing box. Absolutely love the colors and the super durability. The hot/cold cup included right in the box is perfect. I highly recommend this lunchbox for ant child or adult. It is roomy and handy with the attached handle.” — L25
Amazon
A budget-friendly box that’s safe for the microwave, freezer and dishwasher
Save yourself some time on busy mornings by pre-packing your little one’s lunches at the start of the week. This budget-friendly, compact container has three separate sections and a snap-on top. Buy a couple to pre-pack multiple lunches for the week and keep them stacked in the fridge.
Promising review: “This is the perfect lunch box for your child to take to school it is made sturdy and seals tightly so nothing can get out all over your child’s backpack. I also like that it is made environmentally friendly I will continue to purchase this every time I need it” — Amazon customer
State
A really stylish option for literal cool kids
According to the reviews, adults and kids alike approve of this stylish lunch bag that’s available in a slew of cool colors. It measures about ten inches in width and promises to fit a few popular styles of Bentgo boxes inside it. (The full list is here.) There’s a movable divider inside the insulated compartment, a mesh sleeve for utensils and — possibly our favorite detail — a see-through pocket for enclosing notes or pictures for your kiddo.
Promising review: “My daughter actually found these back packs and the lunch bag and requested them for her back to school supplies this year. We couldn’t be happier with this product. The lunch box is colorful and functional. We like the zippered pouch for utensils and I have used the other little pocket to leave her little notes. The colorful leopard print is a lot of fun. The material is waterproof and easy to clean so it always looks fresh.” — J.W.
Amazon
An insulated water-resistant lunch bag with two carrying options
Send your little one off with a Bentgo box in their school bag or grab this Bentgo soft bag that neatly fits the Bentgo box (or any 8.5 inch by 6.5 inch food storage box) as well as a reusable water bottle. Of course, if you’re not into bento-style boxes, this soft bag works amazingly as a lunch bag on its own. It’s insulated, made with easy-clean fabric and comes in 16 fun prints.
Promising review: “Bentgo box fits perfect in the bentgo lunch bag and sack. Works beautifully for my daughters daily lunch packing and perfect. Makes our life easier and keeps us organized. Insulated pack where lunch box fits has enough space to out utensils as well as a juice box as well – comfortably spacey inside. I also bought bentgo freeEr packs which fit in back pocket. Love the color.” — Neel Patel
Amazon
An insulated soft bag with outside pockets
This insulated soft bag has a mesh side pocket to hold a drink, a clip buckle handle to attach it to backpacks, a zipper front pocket to hold notes or smaller items and an inside mesh pouch to fit an ice pack. It comes in 32 prints and solid colors and can stand up on its own, so it’s easy to pack or leave out on the table for your little one to grab.
Promising review: “Bought for my 5 year old to use at school. I was worried it would fall apart during the school year but we’re getting close to the end of school and it’s still in good condition. It’s easy to clean, it’s a cute print and fits the bento boxes and such inside of it with room for a caprisun. Looks like I’ll be able to use it for another school year!” — Bailey
Amazon
A thermal padded bag to keep food hot or cold
Pockets on pockets make this lunch bag a great option for older kids who bring lots of snacks because of longer school days or after-school activities. There’s a buckle handle for easily attaching it to a book bag, a mesh side container for a drink, an inner mesh container and an outside zippered pouch that can fit snacks. It comes in 25 colors and prints in kids and adult sizes (the adult size is one inch longer).
Promising review: “Good quality product that is well insulated. It is easy to clean inside and has held up nicely for my 2nd grade granddaughter. The outside is easy to clean as well so it still looks nice after months of use. She likes that she can unclip the handle and attach it to her backpack and have her hands free.” — Judy R.
Amazon
A double decker bag to keep food separated
Pack colder food with an ice pack on the bottom and store snacks on top with this two-tiered lunch box with a long carrying strap. The two zippered sections allow you to separate food as well as keep some items warm and others cold. It comes in 16 colors.
Promising review: “My son uses it daily & really likes the 2 compartments. He uses the bottom one for cold items and the top for snacks. Perfect for what we need.” — Justme
Amazon
A freezable soft bag that becomes its own ice pack
If your little one sticks to cold lunches, you need this totally freezable lunch bag that works as an ice pack. Between uses, simply collapse it and stick it in the freezer; the walls of the bag itself freeze to keep contents cold all day. Reviews say it gets a little heavier when it’s frozen, so it’s better for grade school kids rather than pre-schoolers. It comes in 12 colors.
Promising review: “No more freeze blocks…this is so easy, just wipe it out and stick it in the freezer. Keeps drinks cold all day!” — shopper girl
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